This week has been a rough on the adoption roller coaster. I want to put this all out there so that you all can understand what is going on with us.
News coming out of Nico's country does not look good. Even families who have met their kids are thus far not being allowed to continue. We are not even registered in his country yet, so I feel like we have to be done.
This breaks my heart in so many ways. We prayed for months about this, took the leap, and then all of this happened. I was told he was my son. That I was to stop being afraid and do it. But then sin prevailed in his country and he was used as a pawn. I'm not sure what else I can do.
We have 14 months until our homestudy expires, but waiting is getting to me. Patience is a virtue, yes, but how long do you hold on when your life needs to go on?
I love Nico with every fiber of my being. No matter what, we will still pray for him, and love him, and if in the future his country reopens and we can finally rush to him, we will.
We have not made any definitive choices yet. We are confused and heartbroken and scared and we are seeking council from our pastor.
I feel like we were so blessed with a supportive "Team Nico" that I fear that if we switch countries we will lose all of that.
Pray for us. For clarity. We need to know our path, what God is asking of us. Pray always for sweet Nico.